"I Talk to the Trees"

[Jocko]

But they don't listen to me. Nor do my cameras, normally because I say things like "You ******* Soviet load of ********* ***** why don't you ********** focus for once".

But just imagine all the fun you could have with one of these, the camera that answers back and offers helpful advice at decisive moments! -
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/MINOLTA-VOICE...ryZ98923QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

What would your camera say?

Cheers, Ian

 

[markinlondon]

"I shouldn't be working with you (pause). I could have worked with Henri Cartier-Bresson, I could"

(With apologies to Harold Pinter)

 

[IGMeanwell]

My DSLR - "Is that film I see? Are you cheating on me with an older camera? I can do anything you want and give you faster results! With that zoom lens I am all you ever need!!!"

My Rangefinder - "That DSLR doesn't understand you... it tries to control you... it does everything for you! You need a more sophisticated, wise, and understated specimen... not some cheaply made overpriced piece of plastic"

I use both to my delight... without a morsel of guilt 🙂

Oddly enough I had a girlfriend who sounded eerily similar just slightly different

 

[Jocko]

"I 'ad that HP5 in the back last week"

Ian

 

[dexdog]

OK, I need a translator for this thread- I am befuddled by the Brit-speak

 

[RML]

My talking (read: cursing) to my FSU cameras would get an 21+ rating in film land. My R-D1, though, gets nothing but encouragements. And it doesn't talk back. I'm not crazy! 😛

 

[ClaremontPhoto]

"You're shaking again, cut down on the coffee or use a faster shutter speed."

 

[robin a]

Fed 2 to Robin......."I'm glad you own stock in Kodak" '

 

[markinlondon]

(More from The Camera a recently discovered unpublished play by Harold Pinter.

I told you not to compensate by two stops. You've blown your highlights again. (pause)
I said you've blown your highlights again. (pause)
You never listen to me (pause).
I said you never listen to me (long pause).
They never listen to me. I told 'em but they never listen (silence).

Please PM me for address for the Nobel Prize

 

[Sparrow]

Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this film what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

Oh yes, the, uh, the Kodachrome 64...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?

I'll tell you what's wrong with it, this film is dead, that's what's wrong with it!

 

[Jocko]

"Call that decisive? I was at Stalingrad!" (FED 1)

"Ishn't itt time for anuffer little drinkie?" (FED 5)

Cheers, Ian

 

[JoeFriday]

you're problem is that you should "sing to the trees" ala Clint Eastwood style

 

[markinlondon]

you're problem is that you should "sing to the trees" ala Clint Eastwood style

But I sing Rex Harrison style

 

[dreilly]

"Do you really need another photo of Zora?" (My daughter)

"What is that box that tap on in front of the tellly?" (looking at my computer...all my cameras are 1950s era.

"Where are all the fedoras and gray flannel suits?" Doing street photography...most of my cameras have been in suspended animation since the 1950s. Like my grandparents.

 

[Bryce]

*istds- "I don't think you should do that."
Bryce- (removing the memory card) " "
*istds-"I really don't think you should do that!"
Bryce-(reaching for the power switch) " "
*istds-"Bryce, will I dream?"
Bryce-(just before flipping the switch and removing the batteries) "Of course, *istds. All intelligent creatures dream."

 

[markinlondon]

I want to know how you pronounce "*istds".

 

[Sparrow]

I want to know how you pronounce "Bas*".

 

[Bryce]

I abbreviate. That camera is my S.T.D. What else?