Criticism appreciated ...

[paulfish4570]

 

[Brian Legge]

I love the elements of this shot, but would have to have seen the a more intentional placement of the building in the background. The overlap between the foreground elements and interest background elements makes it challenging for me to look at either without getting distracted. I think the similar brightness of the foreground and backround hurt this a little as well.

If you couldn't place them slightly different in the frame, another option would be to shoot it little wider open to reduce the amount isolate it. Given the interesting look of the building, that would have been unfortunate but might have worked.

All said though, I do like the shot. The tonality in the foreground is particularly lovely.

 

[Mablo]

Paul, dear friend. You KNOW it's a masterpiece 🙂 It is really really nice and calm picture.

 

[paulfish4570]

Thanks, guys.

Well, I can't move anything. The background is 100 yards across the river, and the foreground is bound by a chaise swing on the right, and mosquito torches on the left. It is a very narrow field of view ...

 

[Turtle]

IMO it almost works, but I find the various elements somewhat distracting. The background is not terribly diffuse or quite sharp and so inhabits a kind of limbo. I like the image in that it is pleasant, but can't move it further forwards than that. I think the elements of the image are fighting with each other a little, both in terms of form and tonality. Even tho there are elements outside the frame, it might be stronger reworked to give primacy to something, or allow everything to be on the same level if that makes sense. As it stands I think a crop on both left and right to remove those elements entirely strengthens the image considerably by allowing the entire image to take on a more abstract feel.

 

[dfoo]

The building is definitely distracting. It removes the 3d elements of the image. I'd probably have pushed the middle flower down in the shot (or perhaps out of the shot) so that the building stands on its down.

 

[Brian Legge]

Heh - fair enough. Its always easy to comment on framing without having to deal with the practicalities of the location. 🙂

 

[paulfish4570]

Thanks to all ... 🙂

 

[Sparrow]

I think we must all accept that bokeh has a place in 21st century photography, this however, sadly, was not it, sorry

 

[sar-photo]

Maybe you should have experimented with a shallower depth of field to throw the background more out of focus. The foreground is getting lost in the background - if you know what I mean!

 

[paulfish4570]

here is a vertical companion shot from the same roll:

 

[paulfish4570]

Sparrow, I do not get your bokeh comment.
Bokeh is something I generally don't think about. But I know it when I see it.
So, might I surmise you think the shot could have used more DOF?
Thanks again to all.

 

[Juan Valdenebro]

Although its washed sky doesn't help and its vertical shape isn't as relaxed, I prefer the second shot...

On the first one foreground and background are mixed up because they share some grays and because the DOF wasn't used in benefit of the image... For sure seen live in color the flowers looked more separated from the background than in the photograph...

I would use a point of view a little bit to the right to avoid the flower cutting the house, and especially use as narrow DOF as my fastest lens allowed me... Don't worry about the house too blurred... It's used just to show it's a joy living there surrounded by nature, and you must give the flowers a 90% importance, instead of 50%...

Beautiful image...

Cheers,

Juan

 

[paulfish4570]

Thanks, Juan.
I did some PP on the vertical one, trying to tone down the sky a bit. If I went to far, the lillies became muddy no matter how much I jacked up contrast.

 

[Juan Valdenebro]

Yes, that is very hard to change... Sure it's easier (and funnier) making the image again: there or anywhere else...

Your best bet would be to go there at an hour of the day when the sun hits the flowers and the house, and use a yellow filter for nice general tone and sky...

With PanF50+ you could shoot handheld at 1/1000 f/2 (or 1/2000 f/1.4 if gear allows) and have very sharp flowers to contrast with the defocused house...

Cheers,

Juan

 

[paulfish4570]

Y'all inspired to me to shoot those lillies in the light rain just after a storm. Got some Acros 100 asa shots on one of theSLRs on a tripod, and then I put the FED-2d on the tripod and shot some Arista Premium 400. Higher angles with just the dimpled river for background. This forum is fantastic.
But I still like the original shot because it says so much about the light where I live. 🙂

 

[paulfish4570]

Good idea, Juan, but the sun never hits the house across the river and the lillies at the same time, because of tree shade and the arc of the sun.

 

[Juan Valdenebro]

Y'all inspired to me to shoot those lillies in the light rain just after a storm. Got some Acros 100 asa shots on one of theSLRs on a tripod, and then I put the FED-2d on the tripod and shot some Arista Premium 400. Higher angles with just the dimpled river for background. This forum is fantastic.
But I still like the original shot because it says so much about the light where I live. 🙂

That's so right! Go for the first one!

"Working" on a shot is great... Living there, you and yours deserve it framed after a bit of more field work...

Cheers,

Juan

 

[Juan Valdenebro]

Good idea, Juan, but the sun never hits the house across the river and the lillies at the same time, because of tree shade and the arc of the sun.

Then when the lillies are under the sun... The house will be fine, and maybe more "romantic" and in rest... With more exposure and less development to help contrast...

Cheers,

Juan

 

[Sparrow]

Sparrow, I do not get your bokeh comment.
Bokeh is something I generally don't think about. But I know it when I see it.
So, might I surmise you think the shot could have used more DOF?
Thanks again to all.

The composition leads one to think the subject is the buildings and their reflections, and those are out of focus, all the flowers do for the composition is lead ones eye down and out of the frame.