Critique #81 *Portrait* 5 Participants

@aliceelizabeth: i like the balance of void and subject matter. as for the subject matter itself, the man looks kind and thoughtful, the topography of his face and his beard give him character. my critique is simple the way that the detail falls off from the beard and face. you get the idea that it is because of bright light but you do not know what the bright light is from. either source or a different edge that transitions to the white.

@marc-a: great balance, framing and composition. the gaze of the child is amazing, like he is all knowing. my crit is subjective based on the contrast you were going for. the woman's hair lacks detail (all black) and the childs forehead is kinda blown.

@shutterflower: i will address both versions since they are both present. she looks dream like and in a trance, but also contemplative. while the BW has more tonal depth in the face, the colour one enhances the expression. the velvia colours add tot he dream like atmosphere. my crit is that perhaps some creative photoshopping could pull some more detail from her face and hair (unless you are going for the blown look (which is not a bad thing if intended))

@raid: thanks for kicking us in the rear, it was kinda a slow start. the facial expression and action is great. it is a peak into the human side or real side (not the show side) of a subculture. my crit... hmm was this the colour of the available light or a coloued BW? if it is a BW i do not like the tone. the grain looks very digital, like it went through a digital filter effect...
 
I will wait to respond to your comments on my posted image until all people here have posted their initial crtitiques. These are the rules set by Ray.

Raid
 
Raid and my other friends,
Please give me one more day (12hours) because I'm snowed under work right now. I didn't have enough time to comment each picture. I'm very very sorry.
Marc-A.
 
thankyou everyone for the feedback so far-I doubt it's entirely perfect but not bad for an olympus point and shoot.

How do I put things into thumbnails? i'm sure it tells me somewhere but I've looked to no avail.
 
Alice, Once you write your comment, click on GO ADVANCED, which is on the lower right corner below the comment box. It will take you to another screen which will include MANAGE ATTACHMENTS, with a browse option. Make sure that the image size does not exceed 300 kB.

Raid
 
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Hello,
I know I’m late, very late, and I’m so sorry about that but I couldn’t manage to comment your pictures earlier (too much work, last speech of the term). My deep apologies.

Aliceelizabeth: your portrait is absolutely great. I like the contrast between the background and the face. My feeling is that this portrait is all about meditation. The look of the man points nowhere, he seems to be in deep thought. The bright light coming from the background and reflected in his eyes creates a mood of mystery (the subject of his thought, his life, past and future), and of calm. Surely this man has seen a lot of things in his life; it’s time to recollect those memories and to shed a new (bright) light on them. I know this is all made up, but this is what this portrait tells me. It’s perfect in the sense that you can’t improve one feature without spoiling the whole composition.

Lex: Candid portrait. You caught him while he was distracting by something else. I suspect he didn’t want to be shot, especially in the morning, and you chose this moment of distraction to make his portrait. The movement of the head is interesting/intriguing: it’s very dynamic and we are drawn to a point (the distracting event) that is beyond the frame. But I have to make the same remark as the others: the main subject is out of focus, and the blur doesn’t highlight his movement but rather the fact that you were in haste when taking the picture. Correct?

Shutterflower: like in Alice’s portrait, the subject seems to be in deep thought, but there is more sadness in your picture. Obviously, the position of the head creates this feeling. If light is not coming from the background (as in Alice’s portrait), it’s radiating from her hair and her face. The source of light and the lit object are reversed: she irradiates like sunshine. The colours are very well balanced. I have one (constructive I hope) suggestions: firstly, I would rather see a tighter portrait or a larger one; I feel uneasy about the size of the frame for I would like to see either her face and her look (like Alice’s portrait) or the position/attitude of her body and the immediate surroundings (not only the remote background).

Raid: I like this cabaret dancer portrait (dancer, I hope Raid). You caught a very elegant gesture; the position of the body and the attitude of the dancer pulling her garter out (or up), are perfection. I appreciate the mood of this cabaret, the other dancer in the background sitting up straight like a statue. The grain is great here, like powder of light. I just regret you cut her right feet off the frame. Maybe you used a 50mm lens, when a 35mm would have been appropriate; or you were too close to the subject, which I can understand … I can picture you waiting for the garter … honi soit qui mal y pense.

Thanks for your comments.

Marc
 
thanks all! this was my first go at this and i want to participate in a few more.

now, about the shot: on an overcast morning in oregon, my father, border collie named annie, and myself walked to the red fox bakery. we had italian coffee drinks and croissants.

i had with me my circ. 1964 minolta minoltina AL-s with foma 100. i had not shot it for a few days and it had been in its case. as a result, the meter had not warmed up. the reading for overcast morning i got has 1/15 f1.8 (aka the meter was not awake yet). despite that i shot a few photos my father and the pup.

upon developing, my suspicions were confirmed as those frames looked black. i scanned them anyways and got something out of them. i suspect the focus issues come from over-development paired with slow shutter and wide aperture.

regardless, i feel that the "issues" with the photo are what makes it interesting. however, i am fully willing to acknowledge my bias.

here is the other shot from that morning: click for a larger view

444483627_b957c576ff_m.jpg


http://farm1.static.flickr.com/244/444483627_2674ffa8fd_o.jpg
 
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Thanks for all the comments so far. It is always fun to perticipate in such a critique session.

My photo was taken from my seating place, and I had no easy way to maneuver around. Also, the dancers kept on changing their locations on the dance floor, so I could not predict which composition/lens would work better. My only fast lens was a 50mm/1.2 lens, and only it allowed me handheld photos in very dim red light. The orignal slide shows only shades of red. I used PS to change the image to B&W, followed by adding contrast and some coloring. I posted both images in my gallery, and this one was better received than the original.


Raid


@raid: thanks for kicking us in the rear, it was kinda a slow start. the facial expression and action is great. it is a peak into the human side or real side (not the show side) of a subculture. my crit... hmm was this the colour of the available light or a coloued BW? if it is a BW i do not like the tone. the grain looks very digital, like it went through a digital filter effect...



Raid: I like this cabaret dancer portrait (dancer, I hope Raid). You caught a very elegant gesture; the position of the body and the attitude of the dancer pulling her garter out (or up), are perfection. I appreciate the mood of this cabaret, the other dancer in the background sitting up straight like a statue. The grain is great here, like powder of light. I just regret you cut her right feet off the frame. Maybe you used a 50mm lens, when a 35mm would have been appropriate; or you were too close to the subject, which I can understand … I can picture you waiting for the garter … honi soit qui mal y pense.



I find myself wishing there were another foot in that image. I mean her leg is cut off at the bottom of the frame, and getting that whole leg in there would have made it ideal. BUT, in order to do that, you would have had to either shoot from a lower POV or to have excluded the light from the composition. I like the light.
Maybe, if you had shot from a couple feet lower, almost from the ground, and used that light to create a bit of flare around her, and then got that other foot in there, it would be perfect.

But then you might have missed her mouth, which I think really accents her presence in the shot.






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