Rafael
Mandlerian
These are just some personal musings on my photography. Please feel free to ignore this thread if it of no interest to you.
Following a PM conversation with another RFF member I got to thinking about my own attitudes towards photography. And I have come to a realization. Simply put, I love photography because I will never master it. I love it because of the myriad ways in which it frustrates me and because of the neverending succession of challenges that it poses for me. No matter how many rolls of film I shoot in my lifetime, no matter how many cameras and lenses I try, no matter how many courses I take or books I read or images I study or photographers I watch in action, I will never master photography. To date, I have taken one great photograph. And though it is not a nude and is in no way compromising, the model has asked that I not show it publicly. So you will all just have to take my word for the fact that I have, in fact, taken one great one.
I hope to take a few more great photographs in my lifetime. It was not until I was 26 years old that I took my first. Six years have elapsed since then and, though I shot many rolls of film during that time, I have yet to take a second. So I am realistic about the number of great photographs that I can hope to take in the rest of my lifetime. And I am becoming aware of the learning that lies ahead for me. Photography provides for endless learning possibilities. I will never master this craft because I will never stop learning it. For the rest of my life, I will always have new discoveries to look forward to. In this sense, photography will truly be my lifelong pursuit.
"So what?" you might respond. The study of classical music, or of fine carpentry, or of the culinary arts, or of any number of other crafts can also be thought of as lifelong pursuits. I agree. So why is it important to appreciate the scope of the endeavour that is photography? Among other things, it helps to make sense of my responses to the various debates that pop up over and over on forums such as this one.
Take for example the digital vs. film debates. Whenever asked for a position on the digital vs. film question, I maintain that different tools are appropriate for different people and for different applications. In fact, I generally view the digital vs. film debates as pointless exercises. And yet, despite my apparently middle-ground position on the issue (one which I do genuinely hold), I remain utterly intransigent in my personal commitment to pursue film photography exclusively. The full extent of my venture into the digital realm consists in the prints that I have scanned in order to post in my gallery here. I have virtually none of the skills required to scan images well. Consequently, I don't like the look of the images that I have posted. The contrast is all wrong. And the images lack most of the character of the original prints. Of course, I could take the time to learn to scan properly and to develop rudimentary photoshop skills. But right now, I have neither the time nor the inclination to do so.
I am a busy person. But I am not so buys that I could not make the time to learn digital imaging skills if I wanted to. What I have come to realise is that I don't want to. At 32 years old, I have only just begun to learn the subtelties and nuances of different films. There are now several films that I know well and can relatively consistently use to good effect. But there are other films that I am only just beginning to understand and to appreciate. And now that I am starting to develop my own B+W films, it is as though a thousand new doors have appeared, all waiting to be opened.
If photography is to be my lifelong pursuit, I see no reason to rush. I see no reason to leave doors unopened. I will never be able to open every door. But I can certainly search out and open as many as I can. For me, and this is not intended as a stetment to be applied to anyone beyond myself, digital imaging would be a distraction from this process of discovery. Learning digital imaging would take up some of the precious time that I have for the exploration of film. Precision and craftsmanship are ideals I aspire to. As a photographer, I never want to be a "jack of all trades but master of none."
My views on the study of photography also make sense of my reactions to the gear-head/artist and fondler/shooter debates. Of course, many of these debates are also silly. But I really believe that most serious photographers fit into none of these categories. Or, to put the point even more strongly, I don't think that any serious photographer should fit into any of these categories.
I used to wonder why anyone would want to own more than one lens of any particular focal length. Those were the days! I now own five different 50mm RF lenses (of course there are certain members here who out-pace me by a long shot!). Photography is not just about capturing a particular composition, or geometry, or colour, or subject matter, or emotion. Photography is about capturing all of these in one's own way. And the choice of gear is important in this regard.
As we all know, different lenses have different signatures. So, does my desire to try many different lenses make me a gear-head or an artist, a fondler or a shooter? I just don't see how I can refine my own vision without trying different lenses. Lens tests (such as those that Raid has posted here) are very useful in this regard. But, given my own experiences with scanning, I am convinced that to truly appreciate the characteristics that distinguish different lenses from one another, I will have to try them myself and look at real prints.
On a more subtle level, the choice of camera body also affects my photographs. This may sound silly, but I hold my M4 with a reverence that I have never felt for my SLR gear. Obviously, SLR and RF photography differ in many respects. But apart from the different view of the world that I get through my M4, I also get a different feeling from shooting with it. And in countless ways, that aesthetic relationship with the camera affects the photographs that I take.
Much of the equipment that I want to try is very expensive. For now, some of the prices simply exceed my financial means. But again, photography is not a race for me. The summiluxes, noctiluxes, MPs, and all their friends will be there when I have the money to buy them. And until then, there is still so much for me to learn about the cameras and lenses that I do own. Every lesson refines my vision of the world. I become aware of new ways of seeing and representing my surroundings: the people, objects, and places that define much of my life.
Photography is a pursuit that takes time. It takes patience. It can frustrate me beyond belief. How many times have I looked forward to seeing a print only to find that what I saw, what I wanted to convey, is utterly absent from that 4x6 scrap of photographic paper? And yet, in those rare moments when the print lives up to my expectations or even conveys a hint of what I saw in my mind's eye when I tripped the shutter, all of the frustration is forgotten. The satisfaction is sublime. It is this feeling that I plan to chase for the rest of my life.
Following a PM conversation with another RFF member I got to thinking about my own attitudes towards photography. And I have come to a realization. Simply put, I love photography because I will never master it. I love it because of the myriad ways in which it frustrates me and because of the neverending succession of challenges that it poses for me. No matter how many rolls of film I shoot in my lifetime, no matter how many cameras and lenses I try, no matter how many courses I take or books I read or images I study or photographers I watch in action, I will never master photography. To date, I have taken one great photograph. And though it is not a nude and is in no way compromising, the model has asked that I not show it publicly. So you will all just have to take my word for the fact that I have, in fact, taken one great one.
I hope to take a few more great photographs in my lifetime. It was not until I was 26 years old that I took my first. Six years have elapsed since then and, though I shot many rolls of film during that time, I have yet to take a second. So I am realistic about the number of great photographs that I can hope to take in the rest of my lifetime. And I am becoming aware of the learning that lies ahead for me. Photography provides for endless learning possibilities. I will never master this craft because I will never stop learning it. For the rest of my life, I will always have new discoveries to look forward to. In this sense, photography will truly be my lifelong pursuit.
"So what?" you might respond. The study of classical music, or of fine carpentry, or of the culinary arts, or of any number of other crafts can also be thought of as lifelong pursuits. I agree. So why is it important to appreciate the scope of the endeavour that is photography? Among other things, it helps to make sense of my responses to the various debates that pop up over and over on forums such as this one.
Take for example the digital vs. film debates. Whenever asked for a position on the digital vs. film question, I maintain that different tools are appropriate for different people and for different applications. In fact, I generally view the digital vs. film debates as pointless exercises. And yet, despite my apparently middle-ground position on the issue (one which I do genuinely hold), I remain utterly intransigent in my personal commitment to pursue film photography exclusively. The full extent of my venture into the digital realm consists in the prints that I have scanned in order to post in my gallery here. I have virtually none of the skills required to scan images well. Consequently, I don't like the look of the images that I have posted. The contrast is all wrong. And the images lack most of the character of the original prints. Of course, I could take the time to learn to scan properly and to develop rudimentary photoshop skills. But right now, I have neither the time nor the inclination to do so.
I am a busy person. But I am not so buys that I could not make the time to learn digital imaging skills if I wanted to. What I have come to realise is that I don't want to. At 32 years old, I have only just begun to learn the subtelties and nuances of different films. There are now several films that I know well and can relatively consistently use to good effect. But there are other films that I am only just beginning to understand and to appreciate. And now that I am starting to develop my own B+W films, it is as though a thousand new doors have appeared, all waiting to be opened.
If photography is to be my lifelong pursuit, I see no reason to rush. I see no reason to leave doors unopened. I will never be able to open every door. But I can certainly search out and open as many as I can. For me, and this is not intended as a stetment to be applied to anyone beyond myself, digital imaging would be a distraction from this process of discovery. Learning digital imaging would take up some of the precious time that I have for the exploration of film. Precision and craftsmanship are ideals I aspire to. As a photographer, I never want to be a "jack of all trades but master of none."
My views on the study of photography also make sense of my reactions to the gear-head/artist and fondler/shooter debates. Of course, many of these debates are also silly. But I really believe that most serious photographers fit into none of these categories. Or, to put the point even more strongly, I don't think that any serious photographer should fit into any of these categories.
I used to wonder why anyone would want to own more than one lens of any particular focal length. Those were the days! I now own five different 50mm RF lenses (of course there are certain members here who out-pace me by a long shot!). Photography is not just about capturing a particular composition, or geometry, or colour, or subject matter, or emotion. Photography is about capturing all of these in one's own way. And the choice of gear is important in this regard.
As we all know, different lenses have different signatures. So, does my desire to try many different lenses make me a gear-head or an artist, a fondler or a shooter? I just don't see how I can refine my own vision without trying different lenses. Lens tests (such as those that Raid has posted here) are very useful in this regard. But, given my own experiences with scanning, I am convinced that to truly appreciate the characteristics that distinguish different lenses from one another, I will have to try them myself and look at real prints.
On a more subtle level, the choice of camera body also affects my photographs. This may sound silly, but I hold my M4 with a reverence that I have never felt for my SLR gear. Obviously, SLR and RF photography differ in many respects. But apart from the different view of the world that I get through my M4, I also get a different feeling from shooting with it. And in countless ways, that aesthetic relationship with the camera affects the photographs that I take.
Much of the equipment that I want to try is very expensive. For now, some of the prices simply exceed my financial means. But again, photography is not a race for me. The summiluxes, noctiluxes, MPs, and all their friends will be there when I have the money to buy them. And until then, there is still so much for me to learn about the cameras and lenses that I do own. Every lesson refines my vision of the world. I become aware of new ways of seeing and representing my surroundings: the people, objects, and places that define much of my life.
Photography is a pursuit that takes time. It takes patience. It can frustrate me beyond belief. How many times have I looked forward to seeing a print only to find that what I saw, what I wanted to convey, is utterly absent from that 4x6 scrap of photographic paper? And yet, in those rare moments when the print lives up to my expectations or even conveys a hint of what I saw in my mind's eye when I tripped the shutter, all of the frustration is forgotten. The satisfaction is sublime. It is this feeling that I plan to chase for the rest of my life.
