Well, I made my "normal" comments based on a 40 year stream of Minoltas and Nikons, a few Canons and my recent Fuji X-E1 (set at 55mm), and I just re-did a sanity check upstairs again, and that's what I see.
You guys want to change the magnification from those examples, I guess that's okay, then that paints us into the corner that "actually nothing is 'normal' because I can always change something - like viewfinder magnification - to change the results" (which I think a wise person noted a few postings above).
That's only if we define a "Normal" lens as one that gives 1:1 magnification through the VF - as you have done.
If we define it as
Wikipedia has, we need to know the viewing distance, and the final image diagonal as well as the image diagonal on the negative to define "normal." But we don't need to know the magnification of the VF.
If we use a definition based on image circle, as I have done, we avoid even needing to know the shape of the final image, viewing distance etc.
All these definitions based on similarity to what the eye sees ignore the important fact that the eye itself is a useless bit of optical engineering but the software reconstruction is amazing.
My personal view is that 43mm is correct, but that in real life a fudge factor applies. 35mm is as close to 43mm as 50-55mm is. To me, this is the range of normal lenses for the 35mm format. Anything wider than 35mm is a "wide" lens. Anything longer than 55mm is a "long" lens - and I know that leaves some very short "long" lenses, but that middling-long focal length range (56 to 90-ish) is short on clear terminology IMO.
Perhaps the cutoff could be expressed in fractions of "normal" - Wide is 1/2 N to 4/5 N, Normal is 4/5N to 6/5 N, Long is 2N+ etc.
On the original question - yes, the wider the harder, based on the "get closer" principle. But some shots are better in WA, and I use the 21mm quite a bit (Super wide = <1/2 N?). Based on Wikipedia definitions, this should mean holding the paper pretty close to the eye, but human vision goes wider again than 90 degrees of arc.