Make them implement the D70 firmware using Edsac Machine Code.
I have the Edsac Programmer's Manual if you want to lend it to them.
I have the Edsac Programmer's Manual if you want to lend it to them.
rxmd
May contain traces of nut
Do you have a D70 or a D70s?
The D70s has an electronic cable relase socket; if you don't feel like buying the original MC-DC1 cable release you can build a cable release yourself. (Sorry for the link in German, the pictures are fairly self-explanatory). Put a threaded socket in it so you can use a standard cable release. Better still, have them do it.
If you've got a D70, the only option is getting the IR release. A copy will cost under $10 on eBay.
Cable releases are getting rare in autofocus cameras, mainly because of the idea that you should be able to control focus and shutter separately. However I have here a couple of 1950s to 1970s Nikons that don't accept standard cable releases either, so at least it's no "innovation" of the electronic age.
Sorry for not offering advanced torture methods but I think there were plenty of good ideas already.
The D70s has an electronic cable relase socket; if you don't feel like buying the original MC-DC1 cable release you can build a cable release yourself. (Sorry for the link in German, the pictures are fairly self-explanatory). Put a threaded socket in it so you can use a standard cable release. Better still, have them do it.
If you've got a D70, the only option is getting the IR release. A copy will cost under $10 on eBay.
Cable releases are getting rare in autofocus cameras, mainly because of the idea that you should be able to control focus and shutter separately. However I have here a couple of 1950s to 1970s Nikons that don't accept standard cable releases either, so at least it's no "innovation" of the electronic age.
Sorry for not offering advanced torture methods but I think there were plenty of good ideas already.
Roger Hicks
Veteran
Do you have a D70 or a D70s?
The D70s has an electronic cable relase socket; if you don't feel like buying the original MC-DC1 cable release you can build a cable release yourself. (Sorry for the link in German, the pictures are fairly self-explanatory). Put a threaded socket in it so you can use a standard cable release. Better still, have them do it.
If you've got a D70, the only option is getting the IR release. A copy will cost under $10 on eBay.
Cable releases are getting rare in autofocus cameras, mainly because of the idea that you should be able to control focus and shutter separately. However I have here a couple of 1950s to 1970s Nikons that don't accept standard cable releases either, so at least it's no "innovation" of the electronic age.
Sorry for not offering advanced torture methods but I think there were plenty of good ideas already.
Indeed, Leica and Nikon 'collar' fittings are not taper PC -- but at least you could use a simple adapter.
It's not so much the hassle of getting or building a cable release -- thanks for the link, by the way -- as the fact that there was a perfectly good standard, still widely embraced, which has been wilfully abandoned.
A very kind forum member has volunteered to send me a spare IR release -- I hesitate to publish his name without permission, as he made the offer in a PM, but I am very grateful -- or I should have tried the TV IR idea too.
Fortunately it's not exactly urgent but it's a project I have in mind for when I have moved the studio from the outside atelier to the rear grenier (which is level with the atelier in the back garden because the house is set into the side of a hill; the grenier is over the former wine-cellar, now a darkroom.)
Cheers,
R.
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rxmd
May contain traces of nut
Depending on how many slides you want to scan, you could also buy a used Nikon or Reflecta scanner with a slide feeder, scan your slides in batch, and then sell the scanner again. You would probably run litte or no monetary loss, seeing how the market currently works, and you wouldn't have to sit next to it and change slides and press buttons all the time.
Roger Hicks
Veteran
Very true, and probably an excellent idea, apart from the hassle of buying and selling the damn' thing. (This from someone who is spending/wasting hours a day on RFF whille recuperating from an appendix operation).
Cheers,
R.
Pablito
coco frío
Several very simple (and better) solutions as outlined above. I think you just wanted an excuse to think up creative torture methods.
rxmd
May contain traces of nut
You could have a friendly surgeon take out their appendices and have them type your RFF comments for you, while you order a used scanner off eBay.
Roger Hicks
Veteran
Actually, I wanted something to hand out at next photokina to camera designers...
Cheers,
R.
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Roger Hicks
Veteran
You could have a friendly surgeon take out their appendices and have them type your RFF comments for you, while you order a used scanner off eBay.
Brilliant! Probably the best yet!
Cheers,
R.
Sparrow
Veteran
where's Torquemada when he's most needed ... siting behind the TV is too good for them if you ask me ... and the Archers omnibus; what's that all about, what fool thought I hadn't heard too much already ... Bill Oddie ... Garrrrrrrrrr
I have a list somewhere
I have a list somewhere
rbiemer
Unabashed Amateur
charjohncarter
Veteran
I do this every week. I use a Pentax DL with a screw mount macro lens and then a 60s slide copier. Then I place handmade lightbox white piece of plastic in front of the copier and remotely fire an electronic flash. I check the histogram and then feed and fire. I then go to PSE6 and hit auto levels.
1941 Kodachrome taken by my father in law:
and 1946 Kodachrome again taken by my father in law:
1941 Kodachrome taken by my father in law:
and 1946 Kodachrome again taken by my father in law:
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Al Patterson
Ferroequinologist
Al Patterson
Ferroequinologist
Why machine code? make them code in either binary or hex.
And if you want REAL torture, make them use Octal...
amateriat
We're all light!
Amazing: Konica went to the trouble of putting a side-mounted, real cable release on the Hexar RF. Fat lot of good it did them. (What's that bit about no good deed going unpunished? )
Roger: I think scanning is the ticket. Dedicated film scanner is tops of course, but if the files don't need to be pluperfect, a good flatbed with tranny adapter will do. (My tabloid-size UMAX has a holder for scanning 32 slides at a time.)
And, speaking of punishment, I've got just the thing: make 'em all moderate Pnet for a week.
- Barrett
)Roger: I think scanning is the ticket. Dedicated film scanner is tops of course, but if the files don't need to be pluperfect, a good flatbed with tranny adapter will do. (My tabloid-size UMAX has a holder for scanning 32 slides at a time.)
And, speaking of punishment, I've got just the thing: make 'em all moderate Pnet for a week.
- Barrett
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-doomed-
film is exciting
Roger,
As far as torture goes this plan of yours, while annoying is not really going to affect those engineers. I used to enjoy giving new hourly techs at my old job fuel pump jobs, horrible experience.
One must drain the tank once the retaining ring is loosened far enough,but you only learn once you've done it once. With that in mind I never said a word as they stand next to a fuel recovery tank , and a bit of gas on thier shirt and hands which becomes noxious after a few minutes of exposure. If the nauseating stench of fresh gasoline mixing with stale gas in the recovery tank aren't enough the slight sting caused by the skin irritation combined with the inability remove that smell from their skin for a few days will continue to make them come close to vomitting is fantastic. It's torture because there is no quick solution to program or long menu sequence to remove the smell.
Translate that into putting them in a small room with that sort of stench(rapidfix comes to mind) eminating for hours, then have them handle some wasted film soaked in the same. Fixer tends to hold it's smell in skin almost as well as gasoline. Failing that late night phone calls demanding a cable release would suffice, or setting off large flares in front of their homes combined with some abnormally offensive death metal blasted at full volume for an hour should do the trick.
-Scott
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Trius
Waiting on Maitani
Make them write a PhD level dissertation on the political and logical debates between Roger Hicks and Bill Mattocks on RFF.
-doomed-
film is exciting
Would it be polite to offer them a razor blade with a note that reads.
Remember , it's down the road , not across the street. He said mild torture not suicide inducing levels of torture.
Remember , it's down the road , not across the street. He said mild torture not suicide inducing levels of torture.
Stephen S. Mack
Member
How about boiling in oil? Nobody speaks well of that.
Or, keelhauling, maybe?
With best regards.
Stephen
Or, keelhauling, maybe?
With best regards.
Stephen
Tom Diaz
Well-known
I can't top the torture suggestions already provided, but why don't you scan those slides instead of photographing them?
Tom