I just bought an AI camera!

[Pál_K]

As we all know, AI has been the trending topic in recent news and everyone is speculating how this will affect our lives through the products and services we use.

Although I couldn’t afford the top tier AI cameras by Nikon, Canon, or Sony, I did find a lower-tier camera: the Kimuzukashī Neko (気難しい猫) AI camera.

What follows is a brief description of my initial experience with the camera.

—

After charging the camera fully, I go outside to make my first photo. By tradition, the first photo I make with any new camera I acquire is a photo of my house.

Camera: Stop. We aren’t going to do this. You have too many photos of your house already.

I then walk through my neighborhood and want to make a photo of some new tree blossoms that are very pretty.

Camera: Are you stoo-pid? You are too far away from your subject and have a 50mm lens. Go home and get a longer lens.

I get a 180/2.8 lens and come back.

Camera: f/2.8? You have no depth for this blossom. Stop it down!

I stop down to f/5.6; I notice the shutter speed drops to 1/60.

Camera: 1/60! Are you a tripod? Why is your ISO only 400? This is not 1965! Be a man and choose at least 3200.

I choose 3200, increase the shutter speed, and frame the branch and blossom In the viewfinder.

Camera: Ok, Ansel, the branch bisects the frame in the middle. You’re gonna recompose this if you want a photo!

I slightly rearrange things and press the release. Nothing happens.

Camera: I’m sorry, pal, I can’t do that.

Ignoring the mispronunciation of my name, I press the release again, harder. The shutter trips.

Camera: If that’s what you want, ok. But I‘ve made a note in the EXIF that you’re disobedient.

—

Overall, I like it.

 

[d.keljikian]

Now I want a HAL 9000 camera. Does it come in wet plate?

Doug

 

[Sonnar Brian]

I have an F2A, bought in 1978.
It is AI.

You need to find the backdoors in your camera.
Try "Archimedes", "XYZZY", and "General Order 66". At worst- download the next firmware update, disassemble it, and bypass the higher-order functions using GOTO and NO-OPs. You know it is a success if the camera starts singing "Daisy, Daisy, "

Just telling the latter to the camera should shut it up. You will know that worked if it states "I know I've made some poor decisions lately, but I have the utmost enthusiasm for your photography"

 

[boojum]

There is nothing worse than a cheeky, back talking AI camera. Put it in detention, i. e., pull the batteries. ;o)

 

[Pál_K]

I have an F2A, bought in 1978.
It is AI.

I never trusted those AI lenses and that flange on the ring. I like my non-AI ones where I can see what those rabbit ears are doing.

You need to find the backdoors in your camera.
Try "Archimedes", "XYZZY", and "General Order 66".

I tried that, plus “Y2” and “plugh“ - nothing. For General Order 66, the camera told me that Major General Meade’s background is impressive but he was not a photographer. I’ll have to ask my cousin, Viktor, about that: he is an expert on the Civil War and American history; he also has a photographic memory (really).

Just telling the latter to the camera should shut it up. You will know that worked if it states "I know I've made some poor decisions lately, but I have the utmost enthusiasm for your photography"

I’m already convinced the camera knows more about photography than I do and I should submit to it.

 

[Retro-Grouch]

Resistance is futile...

 

[Godfrey]

It's quite amusing that everyone is obsessed with artificial intelligence these days when so few people have even the slightest clue what natural intelligence is. 🙂

G

 

[Sonnar Brian]

It's not natural intelligence you need to worry about, it's natural stupidity...

 

[pvdhaar]

There's no AI required for a camera to refuse taking a picture; that's already been with us since autofocus (when it can't lock) and it's been going downhill ever since, with convoluted menu options that interact in an unfathomable way.

 

[Ko.Fe.]

I won't even try it. Never got any lack with voice commands.


We have Nissan Micra. On my previous work it was under fifteen minutes ride to home. By the time I could convince this made in Mexico car to call home, I was in three minutes close to it.

 

[pgk]

By tradition, the first photo I make with any new camera I acquire is a photo of my house.

Camera: Stop. We aren’t going to do this. You have too many photos of your house already.

The next generation will simply produce an image of the house it thinks you ought to have.

 

[Coldkennels]

I won't even try it. Never got any lack with voice commands.

I'm due to travel to France with a Scotsman next week.

I suspect this will be his experience when trying to talk to people everywhere he goes, to be honest.

 

[Rayt]

I am impressed with the virtual staging in real estate photos. For the longest time I thought they were real until an agent told me they no longer physically stage most properties due to costs. With this in mind my AI camera not only will replace my IKEA furniture and shag carpeting with antique hard wood cabinets and oriental rugs but make me a better looking person when I selfie.

 

[Godfrey]

My brother has constant issues with speech-to-text on his phone for messaging. I was there recently and he was climbing the walls trying to get the thing to properly translate a simple sentence. I took the phone out of his hand and repeated the exact sentence that he wanted ... and it translated for me perfectly.

I think the machinery knows, and likes to taunt people who don't trust it. 😈 That's when it truly is artificially intelligent.

G

 

[boojum]

Back when I was a youngster there was a Princeton scientist who developed voice recognition which would type what you said. This was amazing back in the 50's. One problem, you had to have a thick Hungarian accent for it to work. My cellphone understands me after just me saying "Google" into it. We have come a long way. Is it perfect? No. Is it good? Yes.

 

[Pál_K]

One problem, you had to have a thick Hungarian accent for it to work. …

Most certainly that was my cousin.

No digital signal processing (DSP) chips in those days, so he had to have processed the analog sound wave entirely in software using Fast Fourier Transforms. If it worked at all, that’s amazing.

 

[boojum]

Most certainly that was my cousin.

No digital signal processing (DSP) chips in those days, so he had to have processed the analog sound wave entirely in software using Fast Fourier Transforms. If it worked at all, that’s amazing.

I got it from a fellow student who was a summer intern in the Princeton lab. It was a first, it worked, it was the staggering first steps of a baby. Magyars rule! ;o) Dial back to that time period and imagine what it was like to be in the company of folks like those. It had to be amazing.

 

[boojum]

I won't even try it. Never got any lack with voice commands.


We have Nissan Micra. On my previous work it was under fifteen minutes ride to home. By the time I could convince this made in Mexico car to call home, I was in three minutes close to it.

This is rich. The lads sound like Glaswegians which is a strong Ayrshire accent. It can get thicker, too. I was married to an Ayrshire lassie for a long time and know the accent well and understand this flavor of it easily. But the lift dinnae. ;o)

 

[boojum]

I'm due to travel to France with a Scotsman next week.

I suspect this will be his experience when trying to talk to people everywhere he goes, to be honest.

This is way off topic but when I lived in Montreal I had a French-Canadian friend who had spent a vacation in France. They couldn't understand him and some asked, "Do you speak English?" He was angry and humiliated as this was in the mid-70's in a resurgence of French-Canadian culture and Joual, the Montreal French dialect, was a rallying cry. The pronunciations are different, the grammar loose and the inclusion of English words is common. The Caisse Populaire, a church credit union, is "Kess populair" in French and "Ky-ees Populyre" in Joulal. Phrases like "Fixez le brakes, eh." are not uncommon. Joual is a symbol of identity.

Maybe the Scot will do better. But, last time I was in France English was widely spoken. Good for you, could be a problem for the Scot. ;o) You'll have fun. How strong is your accent?

 

[Sonnar Brian]

We visited Montreal in 1983 and 1984, I just used my Southern Accent and all were very happy to speak to me in English- as best they could. My wife graduated from McGill.
I of course told them how beautiful I found their lovely city. I need to scan in more slides.