NYC Journal

Pete,

Thanks. “Maggie” is concerned that I’m be a real crazy bitch.

Still early, more testing, a definitive PET scan.

The incontenance my urologist says is a minor possible side effect, say when doing heavy lifting.

My young age though is leading to aggressive treatment.

We’ll see…

In my case my PSA did not reveal Cancer. Pretty much it hovered around a threshold of 5. Not really a reliable marker and is just an indicator.

Cal
 
Get into some pelvic floor PT if the incontinence becomes an issue. A patient of mine used to pee himself a little every time he tied his shoes, if he didn't relieve his bladder immediately before.
If this is the worst of your complications, then all it means is life got a little more interesting in the planning to go out of the house phase of your day. It's all good.
Phil
 
Thanks for the support.

The PT for the pelvic floor was mentioned by my urologist.

At my mall gym there is a personal trainer that is my age who was a very competitive tri-athlete. She is skilled with maintaining old bodies. For $92.00 I would get 4 personal training lessons/hours at my gym, or pay $40.00 co-pay for PT for every session. I think the better deal is my gym, and the personal trainer pretty much has the expert skills I trust.

I think the challenge for me will be to somehow maintain or retain as much muscle mass as I can without getting “fat.”

I expect to loose some of my bulk, but I don’t want the loss of strength to place me in a vulnerable position. I need to do weight bearing exercise to maintain bone strength. Things like the “farmer’s walk” and weight training. I think I will utilize TRX since it utilizes your own body weight for resistance. TRX is very effective for developing your core.

Of course cardio…

Anyways I will become a different man… The hormone treatment can span 4 month to 4 years.

A big part of retirement involves coping and adapting. This is really no different than any other challenge in life.

A reasonable goal is I want to fit the clothes I own. If I loose some bulk and add some fat, I can live with that.

I can see me cruising on the Empire State Trailway on a 63 gear inch IBIS just spending time on a bike doing the 9 mile out and back (18 miles) two times as a scenic healing long slow distance ride. I think these will be no “Maggie” rides.

They say that fatigue is a side effect, so long gentle rides… This is a time to slow down to do no harm.

When the hormone therapy stops testosterone will return, produced by my testicles and my adrenaline gland.

Anyways this will be an interesting experience…

Cal
 
My diagnol neighbor sold me 9 sheets of exterior grade 5/8 plywood which was just the right amount I needed to lay down a floor in my attic. He bought an entire pallet, and this was surplus, and he passed on the savings/discount to me for $20.00 a sheet. Pretty much a steal-deal.

So now I have an attic floor and storage space. I will have some room to move, so I can go through stuff, organize, and cull down.

Not a bad way to move forward. Gentle and enough to keep me busy and active. As usual, moving forward…

Cal
 
Tariffs will be disruptive and kinda impose a supply/demand imbalance that is two fold. Higher prices restrict trade, and there is a kinda artificial surplus imbalance because supply and demand gets disrupted. Then the costs get passed down and eventually the consumer pays the price or does without.

Tariffs cause prices to go up, and imbalances both the supply and demand. The price increases also are sudden, and so is the implied inflation. The proposed 20% tariff on imported goods is now inflated and projected to be about $2.6K for every household, and this “cost” is about the price of one ounce of gold.

The 20% collected is paid to the FED, so in effect this is a Federal Sales Tax on imports. It is a new tax…

Then there is the escalation that leads to trade wars where other countries or regions like Europe, will impose tariffs to attemp or try and counter U.S. tariffs.

I think in a trade war China has less effective weapons/leverage/power. They are already in a deflationary spiral that has a slowing economy that is not responding to stimulas and is trapped in a deep deflationary spiral. Basically too much “overcapacity” and likely a “lost decade” created by government bad policy.

Germany has an export economy, but their government is a hot mess.

So the big picture is higher prices on imports, a new Federal Tax on imports, and in a way an artificial shortage, while at the same time a local overcapacity.

Right now the Trump bump has created a strong U.S. Dollar, and this hurts U.S. exports as U.S. goods/exports in effect become more expensive. Gold priced in U.S. Dollars has dropped about $200.00 an ounce as a partial result, but also because dollars are being diverted from gold into U.S. paper assets, meaning U.S. Stocks.

Today there looks to be a red screen in the pre-market. The smart money is bailing on the Trump Bump and wondering how far or how bad the suggested tariffs will be on the U.S. economy, and the world economy.

Don’t forget that the deficit is expected to ballon by 4-5 trillion dollars on these Trump mandates that was his election platform and that the House and Senate are Republican controled.

Stimulas takes time to filter into an economy that eventually leads to inflation, but tariffs are sudden and immediate price increases that get passed to the consumer. It is no lie that if these proposals are enacted that basically a new Federal Sales Tax will get collected.

Household debt loads are at record levels, so it is easy to predict a cut in consumption and an economic slowdown is implied. Could lead to “Stagflation” an economic slowdown (recession) that is accompanied with high inflation.

“Tariffs are a bad idea,” says Calvin. The Crash of 1929 became the Great Depression by protectionism, trade wars, and tariffs. Because of record debt loads not only in the U.S., but also in Europe, China, and the developing world. This could be called the “Greater Depression.”

The Trump Bump looks to be a head fake. Gold will recover because of the expected inflation.

I’m glad that we got the heavy lifting out of the way with the Baby-Victorian. Getting that work performed during the pandemic was costly, but I expect that in the future everything will be more costly.

Then there is the deportation/immigration policy. Just know that a worker shortage will be highly inflationary and the effects of a worker shortage will be felt most dramatically in the construction industry, and in the food processing and farming industries.

Another bad idea…

Cal
 
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I forgot to mention that the FED killed the expected December rate cut. The Fed sees that inflation still lurks…

As our deficits increase, 4-5 trillion increase proposed over the next 4 years of Trump’s term, expect highe interest rates and higher inflation.

Cal
 
I have an aggressive Prostate Cancer that will require at least surgery.

I have to have a full body PET scan that will indicate or show if the Cancer metastasized outside the Prostrate “Envelope.” There is some indication that my lymph nodes might be effected, the indications from the biopsy suggest this, but I was told that this is not reliable. The specialized PET scan is basically the tell-all.

The surgery would get performed at Columbia Presbyterian in NYC by a surgeon that performs this surgery robotically. I was told that this surgeon only does Prostrate Cancer surgeries robotically. The side effects might be some mild incontenance, and some weakness in the musculature in my lower torso. Bonus are two small scars.

If it is deemed I need radiation treatment that can be performed at my local hospital. There will be a DNA mapping from the biopsy samples that were collected to study the genetic possibilities and probabilities, so to a certain extent I’m getting a partial free body scan and DNA analysis. I pretty much will learn somewhat my future.

I was told that I will be monitored on a quarterly basis for any PSA level change for the rest of my life. Pretty much I am now high risk, even though Cancer does not really run in my family, except my sister who died recently age 71.

This is kinda when you have a colonoscopy and they find polyps, meaning you need to get a colonoscopy every three years.

Not so sure radiation treatment is required yet, chemo seems to be out of the picture unless the Cancer spread to other organs. Hormone therapy seems to be promoted, where my testosterone levels would be zeroed.

I inquired if I would become more effeminate, and was assured I will not grow breasts. I will suffer a men-O-Pause that would include hot flashes and night sweats along with disturbed sleep. I already experienced this about 15-20 years ago…

I inquired if I will get crazy emotional mood swings and become a crazy bitch. Pretty much I can become a psycho bitch from hell.

There likely will be a weight gain, loss of lean muscle mass, and being vulnerable to loss of bone density.

So it is no joke that I have bitchy part of me.

I made the call for the specialized PET scan, and a scheduling coordinator will call me back. The timeline for surgery is over the next few months. It is a one day procedure that requires an overnight stay.

The genetic testing will take 2-3 weeks to perform and costa about $3.8K-$5K. Bio-marker’s will determine the depth of treatment plan.

Pretty much because I am considered “young” pretty much aggressive treatment is favored.

I feel I’m getting the best of care.

Cal
I admire your matter of fact attitude and positive outlook. Hoping all goes well with the PET scan.
 
Been looking into the pelvic floor exercises. Pretty much don’t want to wet my pants.

Please know that 50% of men as they age will have to deal with or live with Prostate Cancer. In my case the PSA was a very vague indicator.

Cal
 
Had to call again to schedule the specialized PET scan. I got a return call that they await some authorization or approval from my medical insurance. As soon as that happens I’ll get the call for an appointment.

They are booked two weeks out for the PET scan.

The Bio-Marker takes about 2-3 weeks to do all the testing and to write the Oncology report.

I expect when the prostate is removed that some rather definitive testing will happen.

Pretty much today took it easy, just trying to have a peaceful day. I kinda have outlined that recovery and doing what I can to speed that up is more important than anything else. Gym, exercise, diet and a low stress state of mind perhaps until March-spring.

“Maggie” canceled an event in Palm Springs she had booked.

We were going to go to Quebec City to avoid family Christmas drama, but that got canned also.

Glad that Thanksgiving is not at our house…

We were planing to go to Austin in January to attend a baby shower, and that too got canned.

Life got simpler. The good spin on the probable prostate removal, prostatectomy, is that risk of Cancer which could be a future time-bomb is removed, and also through the Bio-Marker testing, I will know of other genetic potential for disease. I just have to hope my Cancer is contained in the Prostate Envelope.

The heating season is causing the necks to slightly bow on my guitars. One guitar has a headstock adjustment, and I straightened the neck with an adjustment. I will use this guitar mostly, and wait to see where it settles and stabilizes. The other guitars have a heel adjustment that requires loosening and removing the neck.

When the heating season stabilizes and the necks settle in I’ll then set them up and readjust the intonation for the winter. Wood is hydroscopic and it expands and shrinks depending on humidity levels. Because I have so many guitars it will likly take an afternoon to set-up all the guitars.

In the spring I’ll have to do this all again.

“Maggie” has been great. She understands that I just need peace right now. She is also putting my needs first. She was happy that I called about the PET scan again today. We figure mid December my urologist will have the results, develope a treatment plan, and have a more complete picture.

The PET scan involves injecting me with a IV that has a 18F, a radioactive form of Florine that is attached to a sugar. Since Cancer is fast growing this sugar will get concentrated into hot spots to identify the rapid metabolism and growth that is the hallmark of Cancer.

Using tomography the radiologist will have a 3-D image to see if or where Cancer has spread. Pretty much the full-picture can be imaged without cutting me open using nuclear imaging.

The Bio-Marker is looking for genetics and mutations…

The excised prostate will also reveal a lot of data.

Regardless, I will have to monitored every three months for the rest of my life. I now have a high Cancer risk…

Cal
 
A cancer diagnosis is quite the wake-up call, particularly when you're older. Priorities instantly get re-examined, and self care (both mental and physical) that has been put off suddenly gets foregrounded. It becomes paramount to question what nurtures and sustains you, and what doesn't, and to eliminate or minimize the latter. I speak from experience; this is what I had to do.
Sounds like you're engaging in this process with your eyes wide open, bravely and calmly. Good warrior energy!
 
RG,

Research has proven that mental attitude can greatly effect a Cancer outcome.

I have lived though so much apathy, despair, and anger. Pretty much wasted emotion.

At this point all I can do is maintain hope, move forward, and maintain a positive mental attitude.

I wrote in an earlier post how I have had a sense of destiny, and my gut feeling is now is not my time to go.

We will know more I figure around mid December, meanwhile I’m not wasting a moment. I have faced life and death situations perhaps too many times. I would not call it courage, maybe just too many life threatening situations have been experience where I should of or could of been killed have happened to really have an effect.

I spoke of having a “super-power” because of the hardships I endured and escaped early on in life. I think this is part of it.

Thanks for the support.

Cal
 
Today “Maggie” has a doctor’s appointment with her PCP.

Tomorrow it may rain.

In the music theory I’m beginning to get a vision of the overlaps of scales and keys. I’m still in a restricted and limited rut doing a full exploration, but all this crossover has to get fully explored and intergrated. This 2-5-1 progression used in Jazz extensively is becoming evident and clear to me.

The work is exciting, demanding, and peaceful. Simple yet complicated.

I’m moving back to a slightly thinner pick that would still be consider rather thick, 1.14 mm from 1.5 mm. I still use the 1.5 for single note playing, but for chording the thinner pick is smoother.

That second body that was a nicely done center-joined 2-piece alder body is now sold. I’m now lurking for other opportunities.

I still daydream about building out that Charlie Christian solid-body. Like a pretty girl this guitar lays in waiting for next year, or if I want to get anxious ordered in December for delivery and payment in January.

The alder body I just ordered will likely will wait to try and do a yellow to black burst that will be a challenge. To do this I will have to wait for warm weather that will promote a good job: low humidity; and hot temperatures favored.

So having future projects to look forward to not only is a distraction, it is just good planning to stay motivated.

In the realm of art, deadlines do not work for me. It kinda distinguishes work from play. I learned in art school that rushing does not produce the best work. Ideas need time to settle and stew. It is a very different work ethic. In fact it annoys people. LOL

In the end I get things done in bursts that somehow are amazing, and this further annoys people. The results speak for themselves.

A great example was removing the ceramic tile floor, a layer of plywood, and multiple layers of linoleum from the kitchen floor. A huge undertaking that no contractor would ever do, but I uncovered the original heart pine quarter sawn narrow planking that dates back to 1912. The end result is a display of love and honor.

Not many people would do what I did. This is my insult, and why I love being a standout.

Snoopy and JJ criticized that we lack privacy because our slope is open. I pretty much have an expansive view that is impressive. It expands our property to include, not exclude the public land that adjoins our property. Know that Snoopy and JJ have woods that adds to our personal privacy.

Even though their property comprises 4 building lots and s twice the size of our property, I dare say we have the nicer yard. I have no envy. The earthworks I’m performing over time is another thing that no-one else in my hood is doing. I literally am building out a cliff like bluff that is increasing the drama of the natural landscape. In 4-years I have restored the environment with brutal hard labor.

Anyone who sees our back-backyard sees a sanctuary and a private paradise. The somewhat hidden She-Shack nested under a cove of trees is an exclamation point. Took me almost a week to erect by myself. Pretty much a crew of 2-3 men was recommended and a full weekend was suggested as the time needed to erect the 8x8 cedar shed kit.

I have a long history of showing what just one man can do alone. This independence I think annoys people because it shows and reflects limitations and restrictions in other peoples lives that perhaps are normal or normalized.

I am arrogant and perhaps cocky. I don’t promote being “Extra-Medium” as Eddie-Jeff remarked. The world is full of mediocrity, and I don’t want to add to that mess.

In Chinese astrology I was born in the year of the Chicken, but this can also be framed as the year of the Rooster. A Rooster is one of the most fierce animals and will fight to death. They strut and display that Alpha-Male behavior and sexuality. There is a very different spin on a chicken in eastern thought.

In western astrology I am a Capricorn: a cross between Elvis and Jesus. I climb mountains and go to places that others can’t inhabit.

A girl did my chart, and I have a Cancer Moon which denotes my strong feelings and emotional swings. Predicted though is some tragic death, and because my life is so great, I kinda know that my time is not so near.

I’don’t believe in organized religion, but I do believe in Astrology, and I feel I have a destiny…

Seems like my greatest talent is annoying people without even trying. LOL.

Cal
 
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I don’t think voters for Trump realized that they voted for likely higher inflation and a big increase in deficit spending.

The headlines were there, but the masses drank the poisoned Kool-Aide anyway.

Pretty much expected future higher rates of inflation translates in to a strong dollar that predicts higher interest rates in the future.

Some countries that utilized the “Carry-Trade” to borrow U.S. dollars using favorable currency exchange rates are in trouble. A strong dollar makes unwinding or paying down this debt harder because U.S. Dollars are now more expensive. Pretty much a scramble is underway and happening that could lead to a currency crisis.

The headline is that certain Asian Central Banks could be in trouble because of the strong-dollar sich-E-A-Tion. Remember that the FED lowered interest rates .5% and then more recently another quarter point. This easing stacked the U.S. interest rates in the opposite direction and kinda compounds a lash of sorts.

The FED cuts made bonds that already were issued worth less because of lower yields. Suddenly an asset used for the carry-trade is worth-less than anticipated, and to compound this loss the dollars bought with another currency got more expensive to compound the loss. Basically two losses: one in value of an asset; and secondly a loss due to currency exchange.

Know that the FED kinda tabled the expected third December rate cut. This flip-flop kinda exacerbated and complicated the carry-trade. Oh-well…

Meanwhile gold is running up again after being beaten down. Understand that gold is priced in dollars so even though gold prices have dropped that gold is expensive because U.S. Dollars are more expensive currently.

So some of the stockpiling and hoarding that Calvin is doing is reportedly happening also by suppliers and manufactures here in the U.S. Pretty much shortages create inflation, simple supply and demand fundementals.

Pretty much supplies are being stockpiled while prices can be considered “on-sale” or discounted presently calculating and anticipating proposed tariffs and sudden future price shocks upward.

BTW don’t think that these savings will get necessarily passed down to the consumer. “Moo,” said the Pig. Know and understand who will get milked.

Moral of the story is the prediction of future higher inflation did not get Trump elected, but it is presently expected and coming. Also it pays to stockpile as much as you can if you expect future higher prices and inflation. Believe that this accounts for part of the stock market surge, but these savings that will transfer into and will become profits and unlikely won’t get passed down to the consumer.

“Moo,” said the Pig.

Target stock is in a tumble. I don’t buy anything at Target or Walmart, well very-very rarely, I’m not that type of consumer, but evidently the people who shop there are seriously cutting back. The people at the lower end of the Social Economic Scale are not is such great shape…

Buy, but don’t consume.

Cal
 
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Welcomed rain expected tonight, tomorrow and maybe Friday.

Let’s see if it is enough to matter…

I cooked some eggplant from our garden for dinner. Used toasted wheat germ to bread the slices. Mighty good.

At our PCP doctor’s office I set a date for my annual physical for next year. There is a doctor shortage and it seems like good doctors like ours get solidly booked out. I figure not to snooze. Medicare has a policy of not allowing these annual physicals to be less than a year apart. Last year I had to reschedule because I was a day under a year, Then of course I got bumped out further by a few weeks.

Oh-well.

I can see that I’m slimming down a bit. I guess I’ll get the number inn the next weigh in, but I can already see the difference in the mirror. A pound on a lean muscular guy is a lot.

We are thinking of setting up a bird feeder. We have two, but never used them. They were gifts. We love the birds, but we don’t want to feed rodents like rats, mice and squirrels. It will be an experiment.

Some satisfying practice on the guitar…

“Maggie” was hearing her pulse in her right ear. Ended up being a clog of ear wax. Oh-well again.

While NYC is experiencing a drought where capacity is only 60%, Peekskill’s water supply is alright. There still is a Fire Alert though.

News is the Northeast is a fire zone as bad as the west. Makes me reconsider moving further upstate. Hmmm…

Another boring day, but I like it.

The annual “Turkey Trot” is soon. Have to buy a turkey to donate to help feed those in need in our community.

Cal
 
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The northeast is definitely not the fire zone of California nor the drought stricken southwest. We don't, and can't get the dry katabatic "Santa Ana" winds which are pump fast, hot oxygen right into fires. Granted, a large scale wildfire in the largely forested northeast would be devastating, but it's simply not comparable between our region which has just entered a dry period, and California, which has essentially always been in what could be called drought, when measured against what 20 million people, and thousands of miles of farmland need. The California drought problem was manufactured from the start, as we've discussed before, climate change is just making it worse. The four corners states are suffering for partially the California problem, but also climate change deepening the drought that existed as a feature of it being desert since before any historical record existed.
When I went out this morning to take out the trash, I smelled the faint incense of our region's forests burning. I'm not sure which fire I was smelling, but it's probably one of them in central New Jersey, as the smoke smelled spicy, almost like frankincense.
One thing to think about is the availability of fire fighting resources if you were to move. And remember, just two years ago massive fires raged for weeks in Canada, making air in the US hazardous, all the way down to DC. So unless you're thinking of moving farther north to Hudson Bay or beyond, just be glad you have a fire department, and have your head on your shoulders to keep brush and fall away from your house.
Phil
 
Phil,

California if not irrigated would mostly be desert except the northern part. The Colorado River gets depleted to irrigate the farms in the Central Valley.

The film “Chinatown” showed some of the politics that involved the fighting over water rights.

According to the article there is a lack of forest management in New York, and strangely New Jersey is doing a decent job with controlled burns and management.

They compared the northeast leaf litter to the dry grass out west. The article was written by a forest firefighter from out west. He discovered in Prospect Park that fire was likely the result of a homeless encampment. The author described that the oak forest and mucho acorns survived, and the reported wildlife habitat devastation reported by the New York Post was not accurate and was unfounded about the destruction of habitate for the animals and wildlife.

This article was published in “The New Yorker.”

Pretty much oak forests benefit from fires was expressed…

The author then speaks of land management, controled burns, and natural cycles of forest fires. Evidently New York has a build up of mature forests that have an abundance of fuel. In his opinion it is a tinderbox of sorts.

In Canada there were underground masses of peat that were smoldering, and under the right conditions they could of rage again. They seemed to have smoldered out over the winter.

Similar, but different.

There was a rather serious fire at Blue Mountain near a gas pipeline two years ago. That fire jumped Washington street and had 100 fire fighters fighting the blaze. No houses were destroyed, and this was kinda lucky. Westchester County has a helicopter that has a water bucket that was used.

I saw it doing orbits over my house.

Wind is and can be a serious accelerant.

When I lived in the Santa Fe National Forest 47 miles northwest of Los Alamos there was a fire alert for a summer. Here in the Northeast when I was considering moving further north this did not seem to be much of a worry. Now it is a concern.

Cal
 
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Rain is happening already. Will it be steady?

There is an expected strong passing storm, expected rain today, and a possible mix of rain and snow Friday.

The heated vest gets daily use in the house. I use in the early morning and at night to take off the edge. It is so light in weight and adds no bulk.

I’m thinking about holding off on the building out of a Charlie Christian solid body since I’ll have an acoustic electric guitar that likely will get a lot of play. The same with the Vintage 47 VA-185 that is a period correct amp for a Charlie Christian guitar. I have a lot going on right now.

Cal
 

A cancer diagnosis is quite the wake-up call, particularly when you're older. Priorities instantly get re-examined, and self care (both mental and physical) that has been put off suddenly gets foregrounded. It becomes paramount to question what nurtures and sustains you, and what doesn't, and to eliminate or minimize the latter. I speak from experience; this is what I had to do.
Sounds like you're engaging in this process with your eyes wide open, bravely and calmly. Good warrior energy!
Supremely well written, this. It's what I would have said, but RG wrote it much better (and with many fewer well-chosen words) than I would have. Well done.

Re #3919, from my time in North America I recall the chipmunks were rather more aggressive in the bird feeders than the squirrels.

A brief aside here. I was curious about Peekskill and did a fast Google Maps tour of your area. In the 1960s when I lived in Montreal and was young and foolish and had seemingly endless energy, I drove from Canada down to NYC for long weekends, usually four-day stays. I recall Albany and a certain place called West Point and a fair few state parks down your way, so it's possible I was in Peekskill at one time or another. Long ago memories are interesting things.

Movin' on... Do you have any wolverines in rural NY state? We did in Quebec and maybe still do in some forests of Canada. During their mating season they can be nasty little pieces of work. One of my uncles was out hunting rabbits one time and had a randy male literally claw its way up one of his legs. Being a kindly sort, he didn't kill it, which I thought was greatly to his credit. So if you do have them anywhere near Peekskill, be warned, they are not friendly house pet longing to be patted by unwary humans.

In the early '60s we had a family of skunks living under our garage, impossible to be dislodged without the obvious consequences by paying a hefty fee to a local exterminator, and my parents didn't want to be responsible for having them executed. So they stayed. We all had to tiptoe around the property. They hapily consumed anything and everything edible from our garden and also destroyed the flowers my mom had planted around the house. My mom would skulk around house corners and try to chase them away with water from a garden hose, to no avail, to those skunks it was only a pleasant shower. One of my cousins lived in the city and had no idea what a skunk was capable of. She saw the mother one day, thought it was "so cute" and went over to pat it. It took two hours in the bathtub and several big cans of canned tomato juice to undo the damage.

Whoever said life in the country is like being in a small paradise was talking crap. At times it's more like always opening cans of worms.
 
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