NYC Journal

I’m excited over the thinline/Esquire pickguard delivery tomorrow. This does not prevent me from removing the neck pickup and staging the necessary wiring changes today.

Pretty much I can convert “Woody” today into an Esquire, and tomorrow when the pickguard is delivered it pretty much is only a cosmetic change.

It is another rainy day. I’ll do some exercise today…

I see a pattern where I embrace the limit of having a single pickup instrument. It is becoming a trademark. Kinda cool.

I have a plan to start transposing to other keys. This freedom to change keys is key to Jazz and improvisation.

It seems like I have an innate talent for improvisation, it comes naturally. Pretty much my life. Perhaps the instability I grew up with has had a profound effect on my attitude. I can say I have a “Jazz-Life” that has had all these interesting and unusual turns with no sense of security or permanence.

The NYC street photography I now understand was a search for some form of permanence, where I created a sense of home that was permanent even though we knew we eventually would have to leave NYC. I have an archive, and what to do with it? It spans a decade, and today NYC is a very different city.

So even with Cancer, I’m still in the game, my life kinda continues pretty much the same frame of mind. Much of the same…

Cal
 
Just go with the flow. A positive attitude makes a difference, a big one. From all that you write here, you do this anyway. And you have mega heaps of positivity and a gung-ho attitude, all of which work in your favor. So win-win.

Your lifestyle of keeping moving (keepin' movin'?) is a big plus. You obviocsly have high reserves of energy, physical and mental. These I hope will keep you sensibly balanced in the months to come.

As for the medical treatments you'll be undergoing, try to think laterally. Maybe do a little research online, but on sensible web sites. To help you figure out what is going on and what to expect. Take it all day by day and let the time pass. Cherish the moments. The Buddhists believe we have a lot of time, but it's entirely up to us to live for the moment and make the best of every day that passes, as it passes. The first casual principle of Buddhism is, not wishing to offend anyone here by using an s-word but what the heck, I will anyway, is - shit happens.

Not in any way preaching religious here, but all this is from a born Catholic atheist from 16 agnostic from 30 now wishy-washy Buddhist happily picking and choosing those tenets and principles that best apply to me in living my life in my old age. Which as I see it is the only way to deal with the complexities of any religion.

Not that Buddhism is so much a religion anyway as a series of ethical principles to deal with life. All of which make it that much harder to live by those principles. I fail at a few of the but not consistently, every time I lose a little ground on my practice I find I've broken the rules in a different way. Which sort of makes me feel a little better. Inconsistency is the only consistent way. This is also Buddhist, I believe, but never mind.
 
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A surprise happened and the pickguard that was suppose to be delivered tomorrow arrived today. It was kinda perfect timing because I was done with the electronics changeover that became EZ-PZ because I had a completed assembly leftover from another experiment I did in the past.

It had a different bleed cap and a different tone cap, but I got to plug in to test if the found values were any good because “Maggie” went for a walk, even though it was raining.

I ended up going to the value caps that I removed, but I kept the removed two pickup circuit intact for another guitar.

That film “Beautiful Day” still lingers. Pretty much this guy who lives alone and has a job of cleaning bathrooms in Tokyo, but some how has a meaningful life and sees beauty every day. He kinda is truly alive, and is a retro man who embraces classic books, retro technology, including analog photography.

In the morning I witnessed the familiar ground fog that collects in the valley that is in my back-backyard. It happens around the fall and in the spring. There is a sense of mystery and wonder in the softness that is very beautiful. While I work on my dining room table modding the guitar known as “Woody,” the birds feeding on the front yard feeder are framed by my window. The rain makes me think of the rabbits that are hunkered down in their burrows.

Pleasant thoughts…

Woody I think looks better with the gold anodized guard. The mother of toilet seat (Pearloid) presents a modern look of garish plastic against the organicness of oiled wood that displays a natural finish. Visually there is tension and shock. Perhaps the look is a bit disturbing, but I kinda like it. LOL.

From a distance the Pearloid looks white, but upon a closer look then the texture within the plastic kinda pokes you in the eye. A bit rude, but still kinda cool in an odd way. The pickguard is kinda loud if you know what I mean.

After this post another plug in test. So if this experiment failed, oh-well, I have other ideas…

Things evolve and devolve… Part of this is searching, and discovery.

So in terms of getting old, it is an evolutionary process. Anyways that is true for me. Hope you are not stuck.

Cal
 
The two cap changes: a treble bleed; and a tone cap on a potentiometer; made significant changes. Pretty much more warmth with less mids getting rolled off on the tone control, and a deeper cut on the treble for a more profound cocked-way sound.

I checked all my guitars that use this switchable presets, and the Blonde still has the lower value bleed cap.

BTW I deviated from the Fender standard for the tone cap. My cap is of a smaller value so it just chops the very top end of the treble and leaves all the mids alone.

The fake mother of pearl pickguard is growing on me. It is kinda hip and also is kinda hypnotic also in a striking way. That’s what is cool about it. When placed in my studio with other guitars on display it stands out. My other guitars seem standard, old, and retro, so as a group they kinda blend together, but this “Woody” stands out.

It has a crazy look about it…

So another task is update the bleed cap in the Blonde Tele.

These bridge pickup only guitars now numbers 4. Pretty much I can use them to play Jazz, but they are kinda horn like. A neck pickup is kinda laid back, but a bridge pickup is kinda in your face.

It is cool that I can pull it off.

One thing that happened when I weighed only 135 pounds, I was still strong as hell, but I was so wire-REA and fast. Instant acceleration because of an incredible strength to weight ratio. I think if I’m on hormone treatment for 3-4 years I’ll loose the bulk of lean muscle mass I accumulated.

Still had a good body, but I carried no bulk. I can live with that.

I also have motivation of not gaining weight and growing out of my clothes. I want to wear all my old clothes untill they are ratty and cool rags.

5’10” and 135-140 pounds I’d be looking like a cyclist. Most of the bulk I gained is in my upper body, chest, arms and shoulders. I won’t have the build of a boxer I suspect. Oh-well. Remember last weigh-in was 157 3/4 pounds.

Anyways this will be a big challenge, I realize that. My age is a handicap, and 3-4 years out my testosterone levels will be naturally lower, so it is unlikely that I will be able to gain all the bulk back. When I was 49 I weighed about 152 pounds, that was when I ran the NYC Marathon off the couch on a day’s notice.

My friend at work overtrained and was too ill, and on a Friday before the event he offered me his bib so I could run in his place. I literally had only one day to get ready, and I finished just 26 seconds under 5 hours. It was one of the high points in my life.

The next day though I could not walk. LOL. I called in sick.

My boss, a jerk, asked me if I wanted to use a vacation day, and I told him no. I explained if my head hurt I would be entitled to a sick day, but that Monday it was my legs that hurt. LOL. What a jerk that “How-Weird.”

Off to guitarland…

I’m really pleased on how things are evolving. Graduating back to mucho heavy picks has enhanced and evened out my playing. I have much more control of my tone with a heavy pick, it kills un-needed treble, and it brings forward my attack to make my playing more percussive.

A lot is evolving…

Cal
 
Still loving the heated vest. Fact is a thin guy gets cold easily and the cold promotes feeding mode for energy/heat production. Also know that I get a cold induced fatigue in the winter.

So for e the heated vest is a Godsend.

I like the new Esquire I created, but I can see a shuffle brewing where more evolution will happen. The rosewood neck on “Korina” has a humbucking route and at one time I had it set up with P-90 style pickups. Pretty much a bridge upgrade to a Callahan would of fully developed that guitar. It had a lot of Gibson vibe, was really-really warm, and had mucho sustain.

So pretty much that is a revisit with an upgrade. I already know this will be a hot guitar.

Then “Woody” would need a new neck. A roasted maple neck will be visually stunning, and will brighten the tone considerably. I can re-install a set of Fender Custom Shop 49 No Caster pickups I once liked, but later discovered the treble response was muted. Changing out the rosewood neck will brighten and change everything.

So pretty much just some shuffling. I have a roasted maple neck on hand for the two-pickup Cabronita I have partially assembled. I could make a new nut, level the frets, and pretty much move forward with what I have on hand.

I can see building out a solid bodied Esquire with a thinline route to exploit the pickguard I just got yesterday, along with parts I have on hand. This would be a back-burner project…

So evolution is a matter of being unsettled. Pretty much that defines my life. My Cancer is pretty much life as usual. I can say that because I have had an edgy life full of risk and danger.

Last night I had a really great practice. I transposed scales up a fifth. Today I will practice transposing the same scales down a fifth (really a fourth).

Lots of internalizing happening that involves muscle memory. It also is a great accomplishment to have good technic to be able to play for hours without harming my hands.

So things are speeding up.

I need to remove a Harmonic Design S-90 pickup out of the DeMarino. I have a Lollar J-street pickup on hand that I want to try. A simple pickup swap that won’t even involve needing new strings because of the Bigsby. Hmmm…

Cal
 
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I reflect on the age of 32. Pretty much a coping mechanism was to be this edgy primal man who displayed very primitive behavior of an animal in that I was only in the moment/present. This was a way to hide from the traumas I experienced as a kid.

I displayed hyper-manic behavior, and people and my family were kinda afraid of me, but my body could not take the stress and all the hyper-activity. My friend Mike and biking saved my life. I had to learn how to relax, or I would die.

So this behavior leads to the humanity I now posses. I was a primal human that was just an animal on instinct mode.

I was a very scary guy. I was also very hyper-sexual… So I know that part of being a human animal driven by instinct to just procreate, and survive.

That totally living in the moment intensity is a unique experience, and I would deem rare. I sustained that part of me, and I can see how this relates to being in the moment and spontainious as being fundemental assets for performing and for playing Jazz.

I see how this part of me is a great asset, and in a way it is a super-power. I see the focus in my guitar practice. I am recognizing my talent.

Anyways, an interesting epiphany about myself… I am becoming what I was meant to be…

Cal
 
Worked on the DeMarino today. Changed out the pickup to a Lollar J-Street. I was surprised that the output is not really that high. The treble is tame, and I like that the tone bypass actually is a very usable preset.

I also changed out a bleed cap for a better spread.

The S-90 pickup will get recycled back into the guitar called Korina where it once resided.

I decided to set up the guitar a bit differently. I tightened the hell out of the truss rod to attempt to make it really straight, then I had to drastically raise the bridge saddles and reintonate the guitar. It plays a lot better and while the action is not so low as other guitars, it plays well enough. I might have to loosen the truss rod a bit after it settles in, then readjust everything.

So now it is a really interesting guitar. I love it.

I also updated the bleed cap on my carved top Tele.

Tomorrow is the PET scan. I’ll be the first patient, so no waiting. No food, only water… Glad I have the early appointment.

Tomorrow kinda is a big day.

Cal
 
Calzone said:
Worked on the DeMarino today. Changed out the pickup to a Lollar J-Street. I was surprised that the output is not really that high. The treble is tame, and I like that the tone bypass actually is a very usable preset.

I also changed out a bleed cap for a better spread.

The S-90 pickup will get recycled back into the guitar called Korina where it once resided.

I decided to set up the guitar a bit differently. I tightened the hell out of the truss rod to attempt to make it really straight, then I had to drastically raise the bridge saddles and reintonate the guitar. It plays a lot better and while the action is not so low as other guitars, it plays well enough. I might have to loosen the truss rod a bit after it settles in, then readjust everything.

So now it is a really interesting guitar. I love it.

I also updated the bleed cap on my carved top Tele.

Tomorrow is the PET scan. I’ll be the first patient, so no waiting. No food, only water… Glad I have the early appointment.

Tomorrow kinda is a big day.

Cal
Click to expand...
I think I can speak for everyone if I say that we'll be rooting for you!
 
Calzone said:
Worked on the DeMarino today. Changed out the pickup to a Lollar J-Street. I was surprised that the output is not really that high. The treble is tame, and I like that the tone bypass actually is a very usable preset.

I also changed out a bleed cap for a better spread.

The S-90 pickup will get recycled back into the guitar called Korina where it once resided.

I decided to set up the guitar a bit differently. I tightened the hell out of the truss rod to attempt to make it really straight, then I had to drastically raise the bridge saddles and reintonate the guitar. It plays a lot better and while the action is not so low as other guitars, it plays well enough. I might have to loosen the truss rod a bit after it settles in, then readjust everything.

So now it is a really interesting guitar. I love it.

I also updated the bleed cap on my carved top Tele.

Tomorrow is the PET scan. I’ll be the first patient, so no waiting. No food, only water… Glad I have the early appointment.

Tomorrow kinda is a big day.

Cal
Click to expand...
Thinking of you today
 
The PET camera was down today. I’m rescheduled for Tuesday at 7:00 AM.

I found out that the radio-tracer is Gallium 68, which I think goes to the bone. It has a half-life of 110 minutes verses Florine 18 which has a half life about 2 hours.

Gallium is made by a nuclear generator, and not by a cyclotron that adds either a proton or deuteron (Proton and Neutorn)) to the nucleus of a target atom.

Basically when prostate Cancer metasticises it jumps to the bone.

So the Friday after my Pet scan I have an appointment with my urologist, so I will get the smut.

As I posted it will take a few days for a radiologist to write a report… My Urologist should have it in time… Oh-well…

Spent the day dismantling “Woody” and transferring the components to “Korina.” Both guitars are made from Korina, but one in black korina with crazy grain, and the other is white korina which lacks the crazy streaks of black that are kinda wild.

The two different woods actually come from the same tree, just different parts. Kinda like dark meat on a chicken or turkey.

I’m a vain man, and while Woody sounded great, visually it was odd and weird. Back in the 70’s it was popular to strip off finishes off vintage guitars to the raw wood, and even Fender made natural guitars that had a clear coat.

So I now kinda have a 70’s vibe and look with the Pearloid thinline/Esquire guard. Still looks a bit crazy, yet it also is cool. Definately has a 70’s vibe. Korina has a tone kinda like mahogany, rich in mids with a pronounced fundemental, with perhaps with an upper mid sheen.

So the effect is a more subdued treble. Know that Tele’s are mucho bright and especially the bridge pickup. Pretty much the korina has a more throaty sound that is a bit less in your face.

I found out that my procedure can only be performed on Tuesdays or Fridays because the nuclide is harvested only on those days by the supplier.

Pretty much I’ll have to stay away from people for about 10 hours or 5 half-lives for the radioactivity to decay. Another oh-well…

So it is good that I’m getting the PET scan early in the morning because I can’t have any food or coffee. Only thing permitted is water.

It will be interesting to plug in Korina. It is a solid body, while Woody is/was a semi-hollow. Korina weighs a lot more. I can already tell it has a different vibe. I’m certain the pickup has to be adjusted to optimize the sound. My quick plug in though was interesting already. Very smooth.

Made it though another day… Now I wait for Tuesday…

Cal
 
“Maggie” yesterday met a woman who lives in Peekskill and owns a home here, but also has a summer cottage in Renold’s Hills.

The locals in Renold’s Hills call the marsh “the worm hole” because once you go past the marsh it kinda is other worldly and a different universe.

So this woman lives about 2 miles away. Evidently this woman who was a corporate lawyer also owns a home in Madhattan.

Then I figure that Renold’s Hills is of value to NYC dwellers that can take the train, and walk about 2 miles to their summer homes. No car is needed.

So pretty much Maggie is kinda interested in maybe securing a cottage. The Co-op has a pool. Could be cheaper than building out a second story on the garage.

Hmmm.

Cal
 
Evidently Gallium-68 is used for neuroendocrine tumors.

If caught in time 96-97% survival rate, but the number goes down to only 68% if it spread outside the initial organ.

With Cancer pretty much if you live for 5 years after treatment you are considered cured. Know that Cancer survivors often develop other Cancers.

Meanwhile my PSA only recently was 6.8. Not really that high over the threshold of 5. Generally you want a PSA under 3.

My hope is that my Cancer is contained within the prostate envelope and has not spread to other organs. There are some glands by my prostate and the biopsy revealed possible or probable Cancer. The biopsy results for the glands may or may not be Cancer I was told. Depends…

I display no symptoms for neuroendocrine Cancers.

So the PET scan is really about how far has my Cancer spread.

So the hormone treatment could be long-term. I will become a different man…

Next Friday meeting with my urologist will be the very big day. A treatment plan I guess will be set, and I’ll find out how bad this is.

I apologize for the spread of worry.

Cal
 
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No way in this planet are you spreading worry.

As I see it, you are exchanging information with us - valuable information to many.

As well we share your concerns, and we all hold out the greatest of high hopes for your treatment and recovery.

For me you come across as someone I could talk to, who can open up and share concerns that many of my male friends tend to bottle up and hold in. No alpha-male bravado here. Just life as it is. Warts and all.

No need for any apology, you are an inspiration to many of us here. Critical-lateral thinking seems to have become somewhat of a rare commodity in our overstressed world, and you provide a refreshing alternative to all the fluff and bother that passes for our so-called society.

Rest assured that we are interested in your well being, and we are behind you all the way in your coming treatment phase.
 
A tip I learned yesterday is that hydration and drinking lots of water will help my body excrete the radiation from the radiophrmicuetical that gets injected for the Pet scan. Good to know.

This neuroendocrine is usually in the pancreas and GI track. To be honest treatable if caught in time, but pretty bad outcomes if not.

Retirement is a second life of sorts. Pretty much I will be a changed man after treatment. I am considered a pretty boy, and it seems hormone therapy will change me. Unsure of the length of treatment, but from what I read it could be 3-4 years.

So my adaptation certainly will be a new experience. I get to enjoy and embrace the feminine side of me. Hopefully I don’t become the bitch from hell.

It is not that I don’t have deep feelings, but as a man I feel I have more control over my emotions. “Maggie” emotionally is suffering right now. She is kinda tender.

At this point the waiting means just more days to occupy myself. The guitar shop simulations and my practice are rewards that are moving me forward. I want to continue this work.

I don’t have time to be scared, I don’t want to live in fear, but there are risks and probabilities… Pretty much either a good or bad outcome…

So I have a feeling, and this is not emotion, that now is not my time, and I will be gifted the time to develop my guitar playing. I can see how an emotional opening could be actually liberating and add to my expression to be in the moment. This would be great for performing.

Biking will become very serious. Again biking will save my life. If I can’t maintain my boxer like build, I will go lean endurance athlete via cardio.

Anyways what lays ahead certainly is a unique experience. A salvation of sorts, and a third life.

Cal
 
Eggs and meat have gotten costly. Trader Joe’s the last two visits no longer sells eggs. They pretty much sold eggs as a loss-leader to draw in customers. I bought 3 dozen every week, and I eliminated yokes to cut the cholesterol.

So now I evolved to only eating three eggs a day, and I do more plant based protien.

By mistake I bought Trader Joe’s steel cut oatmeal. It likely is the most unprocessed food, and it takes me about 25 minutes to cook. I disregard the instructions that say boil hard for only 5 minutes. I do it for ten and then after that 15 minutes of slow simmer with some stirring.

This is not the 5 minute rolled oats from Quaker. I happen to like this steel cut a lot. To me it is worth the extra time. I added a serious amount of fiber to my diet.

So I’m evolving already with the times… Little things add up.

Cal
 
Cal, steel cut oats are the only kind I like for breakfast. Here’s a link to a recipe that makes it easy.

www.theartofdoingstuff.com

Overnight Oatmeal. Wake up to creamy Steel Cut Oats.

Steel Cut oats make the best oatmeal but that creamy goodness comes at a price. Time. Instead of simmering them for 30 minutes try this overnight oatmeal method!
www.theartofdoingstuff.com www.theartofdoingstuff.com
 
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